Remember when you thought Sharknado was the most amazing film ever made? That’s only because you never saw Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus, the greatest of The Asylum’s shark epics.
I desperately want to work for Asylum Studios, and (was) writing them once a month like Andy Dufresne. I’m a huge fan of their work, and not entirely in an ironic, hipster sort of sense. I genuinely enjoy watching their films.
While the reviews may not always be as kind as you’d think for someone trying to get a job with the company: 1) The reviews are always honest. 2) They haven’t hired me yet.
The B Movie Review 
I don’t know why they wouldn’t hire you, you are cordial, upbeat and your writing is witty and fresh.
If you’re not being sarcastic (or really, even if you are), thanks! I appreciate all non-bot comments. Unless you are a bot, Allen. In which case, I’m impressed.
I really dig your blog and the idea to review B movies. I think they are awesome. My secret closet desire to work on props for the Stargate SG1 series, to create all the gadgets, or to write a script for a B sci fi show, but that window of opportunity is closed by now :). Instead I am a lawyer by day and a complete nerd evening through morning. Would you like to maybe co-contribute reviews for my blog? I have plenty of B Sci Fi in the pipeline for the review. I think there is a way for another person to post on my blog as another author. No problem if you don’t. I’ll still read your stuff.
Sure, that sounds great. Let me know about the particulars. thebmoviereview@gmail.com.
I’ll figure it out within a day or two and will send you an email.
Gosh your reviews make me want to watch these movies. They really aught to pay you for the promotion, because I’m sure nothing else works!
Haha, I do my best.